To write a blog you have to have something to say or at least think you do. I probably belong to the latter category; nonetheless, here I am. I think the best way to start off is to let you know who I am and what I plan to do here.

On this corner of the web, I hope to explore the weird and the bizarre, giving my readers a look at a world not normally seen. I’ll focus mostly on literature: bizarro fiction, experimental fiction, surrealism (both old and new), weird fiction, and other forms of speculative fiction (did I say “fiction” enough?). My only caveat: I don’t believe in the bizarre for the sake of being bizarre.

As you’ve already gleaned, my name is Zé Burns. It hasn’t always been, but that’s another story. I was born and raised in Seattle, a fourth generation Washingtonian. I won’t bore you with the details of my youth, except to say I was 11 when I first got the writing bug.

This evolved when I reached high school and my freshman English teacher inspired me to write my first novel. It was a cliché-laden piece of crap, but it led to a habit of turning out novel after novel, through my teenage years and into my twenties. Writing and reading proved life-saving as I went through a debilitating illness.

These formative years turned me into the aspiring author I am now. I have five novels under my belt (none currently published) and too many ideas with neither the time nor capacity to implement them. I find myself all too busy these days writing, outlining, and editing.

All my stories, written or brainchildren, take place in the same setting (though independent of each other), a setting I devised before I could read or write. Its broadness allows me to choose from among a host of genres, helpful as I never like to write the same thing twice.

Italo Calvino, Bohumil Hrabal, Franz Kafka, and Kurt Vonnegut are my literary heroes (though I do have a guilty pleasure for the pulp authors of the early 20^th century). I am obsessed with Brazilian culture, especially bossa nova, and I’m currently learning Portuguese. I love the theater, but rarely have time for that any more.

You can usually find me horizontal when I’m not writing. My spare time is made up of reading, daydreaming, shooting pool, and collecting all manner of “cute” things (including Lucky Cat statues). I can be obnoxious at times, boring at others. Fortunately, my friends have a high tolerance for my nonsense.

I live with my cat Queenie and a mountain of books that threatens to crush me in my sleep.

I hope you enjoy what I have to say on this blog and that you’ll follow me along on this journey.